Better Late Than Never
by Onedergirl
Summary: Harry finally tells Seven how he feels about her. *Character Death* Please r/r


_A/N: Just wanted it to be known that this was my first completed fanfic. Set somewhere during Season 5, though it really doesn't matter as this is AU anyway. This gets kind of melodramatic, and I suck at technobabble, so you are forewarned._

_Disclaimer: I'm just borrowing and playing with Paramount's toys. No harm (or profit) is intended._

Better Late Than Never

by Onedergirl

The lights dimmed, giving the hazy room an eerie, yet romantic and inviting atmosphere. He sat there still, never taking his eyes off the woman across the room from him. She had stood there all night, swaying to the music, lost in its beauty. He found that intriguing. The music had just slowed down, taking on a blusy, siren-like quality. He meant to stand up, ask her to dance, but she was in motion now. Her hips gently swaying in time to the music. It had a hypnotic quality on him. The crowd, all couples lost in their own worlds, parted for her as she walked. She locked eyes with him, and time slowed down, committing to his memory every movement, every facial expression. Finally, after years of walking, she reached him. Her face was somewhat icy looking, yet he thought he could see intense emotions in her crystal-clear blue eyes. The light bounced off her shiny blonde hair as she whispered to him, asking him to dance with her. He got up and, taking her into his strong arms, ushered her onto the dimmed dance floor. The music played on, and the couple came closer to each other, looking into each other's eyes. Their dancing slowed as their preoccupation with each other took over, leaving only the music and each other for them to grasp onto. 

He could hardly believe that he was the one who was dancing with her, holding her. He looked deep into her eyes, and she looked into his, and an unspoken conversation passed between them. Finally, as the music still played on, he asked her what her name was.

she replied, just loud enough for only him to hear.

He repeated the name to himself, loving the way his thoughts made it sound absolutely beautiful. He wanted so badly to kiss her, but he held back; he wasn't sure if he should be so bold. He couldn't help himself. It seemed to him that they were made for each other.

The last chords of the music sang out over the entranced crowd. He could hardly believe the dance had been so short. He realized that the evening was over; at least, the dance hall was closing down for the night. But, before the lights were raised, he looked down at her once again, contemplating kissing her. She looked up at him, and he thought she was expecting him to. Ever so slowly, they came together. Lips almost touching. Almost heaven,' he thought as his eyes closed and his lips—

Seven of Nine to Ensign Harry Kim.

He pulled up short. Computer, freeze program, he managed, angry at having been disrupted. What is it Seven? he asked, hoping the strain wasn't audible in his voice.

Apparently it wasn't. I require your assistance in Astrometrics.

I'll be right there Seven, Harry answered, sighing. Kim out.

He looked down at his companion—Anne was her name. He half-smiled as he realized that the person who had interrupted him was the of this hologram. He wondered to himself what Seven would think if she knew about this little program of his or, for that matter, what she would think of his artistic license with her looks. He shrugged it off.

he said, still looking at the beauty he had created, save program. Kim Alpha Omega Seven Nine.

"Program saved, the computer chirped back, seemingly unsympathetic to Harry's feelings.

End program, he called again. The lovely face and eyes vanished to show the boring holodeck grid. Harry sighed. His uniform on, he walked out of the holodeck, whistling the song he had just heard.

*** 

She stood at her console, fingers dancing gracefully over it. The scans she was running were routine, but mandatory. The beeping on her console did not annoy her, but merely confounded her. She had been slightly surprised to find that the EPS relay in Jefferies tube Gamma 27 was not responding according to normal parameters, and the more she attempted to fix the problem from Astrometrics, the worse it got. It was at that point that she decided it would be wise to ask for Ensign Kim's assistance. From all indications, she would need him to help her correct the problem on the site.

The hissing of the doors behind her alerted Seven to his arrival. Without turning around, she acknowledged him. Ensign Kim.

he answered as he walked in and stopped behind her. What is it that you need assistance with?

The EPS relay in Jefferies Tube Gamma 27 is not responding within normal parameters. My attempts to correct the problem from Astrometrics have failed. I need you to go with me to the Jefferies Tube to correct the malfunction.

Harry sighed. They gathered the equipment they needed, and made their way to Jefferies tube Gamma 27.

***

Upon their arrival, the two began scanning the EPS relay without so much as a word to each other. And it was at the precise moment that Harry was finishing his tricorder scan that he had an epiphany of another nature. He loved her. He had from the time that they had started to work together on the Astrometrics project almost a year and a half earlier. He had known it then, but when she had propositioned him in the mess hall, he had been scared. And he had realized that she was nowhere near ready for any kind of romantic affiliation, as she would term it. He had denied it to himself, and even fooled himself into believing that he didn't feel that way about her anymore. Meghan Delany, he had told himself, was the girl of his dreams. And maybe for a time, she had been. But that was before he had met Seven, of course. Of course, after Meghan, there was Tal. If anyone besides Seven had been close to taking his heart, it was Tal. But he had known from the start that they wouldn't last, simply because neither was willing to sacrifice what they had for the other. He supposed it was an old story. In any case, time had healed the pain and the sickness, and now he looked back at his time with Tal fondly, and with no regrets. 

And he lived in the present. It was funny, he mused, how he had come to this revelation during a routine scan of an EPS relay in a Jefferies tube. But, he figured, it shouldn't come as much of a surprise. Seven had been on his mind a lot lately. Harry had noticed how they had slowly drifted apart. Lately, Seven relied more on the Doctor than on anyone else, including the Captain. It saddened him how they no longer talked when they worked, or even when they were in the mess hall at the same time. And the worst part was that he wasn't sure if she even considered him a friend anymore. How could you be friends when you didn't interact? As he sat pondering that problem, his tricorder started beeping, alerting him to the problem. He stared down at his tricorder in horror. If they didn't get out of there soon . . . .

We need to get out of here now! Harry started shoving Seven toward the tube's hatch.

For what reason?

My tricorder diagnosed the problem as a rupture and plasma leak in the EPS relay. If the radiation from our tricorders comes into contact with the plasma . . . 

The two renewed their efforts to exit the Jefferies tube. Unfortunately, once they reached the hatch, they discovered that it wouldn't budge.

Kim to Bridge.

Bridge here, came Captain Janeway's voice.

Captain, Seven and I are stuck in Jefferies tube Gamma 27. There's a plasma leak in here. We need a team to come get us out of here as soon as possible.

Understood. Tuvok, B'Elanna, get a team down there now. Harry, Seven, just stay calm. Help is on the way.

Understood. Kim out. Harry looked over at Seven, who still remained calm, despite the danger of the situation. Seven, I'm going to try and reroute the plasma flow through another EPS relay. That should stop the amount of plasma that leaks in here.

Seven merely nodded, and started heading toward the control panel, but Harry stopped her. 

No Seven. You stay here. I can take care of this. Seven opened her mouth to speak, but Harry overrode her. And I outrank you, so I expect you to follow my orders. Is that understood?

There was a long pause before Seven replied. 

Harry nodded once and turned to head back to the control panel. He worked feverishly to stop the flow of plasma into the Jefferies tube. He was just starting that task as he heard the team begin to cut through the hatch. They were nearly done cutting through, and Harry was almost finished cutting off the flow of plasma into the Jefferies tube when he realized that he wasn't going to make it. It was a sixth sense that he had, at this moment, which caused him to look over at Seven. Time slowed down and he looked into her eyes. In her eyes, he saw his life reflected back at him, and he knew that he had to get to her and protect her before the entire console in front of him exploded. He moved towards her and stretched himself out as the blast from the explosion ripped through the tube and sent him flying at the wall. 

The world spun and blurred, getting increasingly brighter. His skin felt as though it was being dissolved off his bone, as the heat and fire from the explosion washed over him. He smelled the smell of burning flesh, and felt the white-hot pain in his head as he hit the wall with tremendous force. And as quickly as the world around him had brightened, it began to dim as his pain overtook him. It was precisely then that an angel looked down on him, her hair mussed and face seared. He smiled up at the angel, and believed he saw her crystal clear blue eyes turn slightly red. He saw her lips move, but could not hear a sound. And that was when he managed to voice a thought that he had wanted to say for the longest time. I love you, Seven of Nine. And then he fell into the black oblivion.

***

. . . The explosion occurred just as the rescue team managed to cut through the hatch. Those in first heard Seven call for the emergency medical beam out. When they arrived in sickbay, Ensign Kim was already dead. The Doctor immediately began treating him, but to no avail. Seven even tried resuscitating him with nanoprobes, but apparently it was already too late. The Doctor declared him dead at 1751 hours. Lieutenant Torres has concluded that the explosion was a result of the high level of plasma already in the Jefferies tube, combined with the radiation from the tricorders. It is my judgement that his death was the result of an accident, and that he did everything he should have in order to prevent the explosion. 

Captain Janeway's tears rolled down her face as she read over Commander Chakotay's report about the accident. He was too young. It shouldn't have been his time to die. Not this early in his life. He had lived more than many people his age, and even some older than he, but he still had so much more that he could have accomplished. And to have him die as the result of an accident, it seemed like such a waste. She felt the loss keenly, because, as she had once admitted to Harry himself, I think about you differently than the rest of the crew--which is not to say that I don't care deeply about each of them—but, you came to me fresh out of the Academy, wide-eyed with excitement about your first deep space assignment. From that first day, I've always felt more protective of you than the others. The fact was, she felt as if she had lost a valued member of her crew . . . and a son. And the tears flowed on, until her door chimed.

Hastily, she wiped her eyes and face, and turned to the viewport behind her. Come in, she said flatly. Behind her, the doors hissed open, then hissed shut again. The room was silent for a moment, before a voice said, 

Yes Seven? the Captain asked before turning around and looking at her. Seven's eyes were red-rimmed, and her eyes were filled with pain, though her face betrayed no emotion. 

I was hoping that you could explain something to me.

The Captain was rather surprised at the words Seven had said. It was probably the last thing she expected to hear from Seven. She motioned for Seven to have a seat in front of her desk. I'll do what I can.

Seven nodded. Then she began. It is in regards to . . . Ensign Kim. 

Captain Janeway could see that Seven was having difficulty with this. Go on, she encouraged softly.

When we discovered what the problem with the EPS relay was, he insisted on going back to the control panel and attempt to cease the flow of plasma into the Jefferies tube. However, he ordered me to remain by the hatch. I did so. He was almost done when suddenly he stopped working and looked at me. He headed toward me, and that was when the explosion occurred. Here she paused to regain control of her emotions. Captain Janeway remained silent, waiting for her to continue. After a moment, she did. I went over to him and assessed that he was seriously injured, which is when I called for the emergency medical beam out. Right before we dematerialized, he said to me that he loved me. I do not . . . understand, nor do I know the correct way to deal with that knowledge. Additionally, I am feeling . . . guilt over having put him in the situation that would cause his death. If it had not been for me asking him to assist me, when he was off-duty, he would more likely be alive now.

Yes, but someone else might be dead. Captain Janeway sighed, got up and paced. Seven, it isn't your fault. You both followed procedure on this one. What we have to do now is move on. I don't think Harry would want us to dwell on this. As for his . . . confession, I'm sure that one day you will understand. Always remember how special he was, and how much he meant to you, and you will honor his memory. You will learn to deal with it when the pain has lessened. And the only thing that will lessen the pain is time.

Seven seemed to absorb this, but she didn't say anything at first. Finally, she nodded her head. Thank you Captain. I appreciate your help. With that, she was gone.

***

The halls of the starship Voyager were empty. A quick ride on the turbolift to the messhall revealed a large part of the crew, silently staring out of the viewports. The silence was broken by a human female voice in the center of the messhall.

We are gathered here to remember our honored dead, Ensign Harry Kim. Ensign Harry Kim was- here the Captain's voice cracked, and soft weeping could be heard. A small pause and then the Captain continued, was a fine officer, a brilliant computer programmer, a perfect gentleman, a loyal and devoted friend, and a loving son. Harry was all and more that any captain could have asked for, and I feel honored to have had him as a part of my senior staff, as well as my friend. A single tear spilled out of one of her eyes, and slowly rolled down her cheek. She paused momentarily, and then resumed. Harry touched all of us in a different and special way, and I have no doubt that each of us will remember him with love and respect. Though this ship that he so loyally served for five years will continue on its mission, he will continue to sail through the stars, always headed in the direction of home. His memory will live on in the hearts and minds of those that knew him best. Godspeed, Harry Kim. We will never forget you. An old dirge, played on clarinet, began as the Captain said her next words. Mr. Tuvok, fire torpedo casing. A muted sound was followed by a single dot of light as it arced and sped away from Voyager.

A memorial service and gathering will be held in the messhall at 1800 hours. Those of you off-duty are welcome to attend. Thank you. And with that, the Captain retreated out of the room.

***

The door hissed open, admitting eight shadows, one-by-one, into the dark room. The door closed with a hiss, and the eight stood silently for a moment, each preoccupied with their own thoughts. But, it was not to be. A voice from the darkness spoke up. Computer, activate program Kim Omega S-S-1.

A light from above appeared, and in front of the eight stood Harry Kim, dressed in his uniform. Each took in the sight of the man that, intellectually, they knew they would never see again. A moment later, the voice said, begin program.

With a beep of acknowledgement, the figure unfroze and began to speak.

If this program has been activated, then that means I'm dead again. Only this time, I'm really dead. A small smile. I didn't think that would be funny, but you can't blame a guy for trying. Anyway, I don't know if I can tell you all how much you mean to me, but I will certainly give it a try.

the hologram said, and the Captain Janeway stepped forward. You are such a wonderful person, and an excellent captain. I thank whatever Supreme Being there is that I was assigned to Voyager. You believed in me, and I think I learned more in my time on Voyager than I have in any other time of my life. And I owe a great deal of that to you. I can only hope that I never failed you, because that would be a violation of all the trust that you had in me. I don't think that there are words enough to tell you how much I admire you, and I hope that you had enough reason to feel that I was worthy of all the trust and teaching that you gave me. Please take care of yourself, and make it back home safely. Thank you for everything. The Captain stepped back, her eyes glistening from unshed tears.

Commander Chakotay, Harry said as Chakotay stepped forward. You are one of the most principled and spiritual men I have ever met, and I couldn't respect you more. Sure, you had your share of fun at my expense with that twisted sense of humor of yours, but I know that your intent was never malicious. I admire the way with which you worked with Captain Janeway to meld the two crews, not to mention a sentient hologram, a Talaxian, and a former Borg, together. What you accomplished, most could never dream of. And, I admire your selflessness, because of how you destroyed your ship and agreed to meld the crews into one Starfleet crew. Just, try not to go on too many shuttle missions. You have to get back home in one piece. Thank you, Commander. Chakotay smiled a sad smile as he stepped back, and Harry continued.

Commander Tuvok, Harry said as Tuvok stepped forward. You are so very logical, and your logic serves you, and this entire ship, well. Your voice of reason proved helpful in countless situations, and your counsel was beyond compare. I respect you and your accomplishments so much. And, even though on occasion, someone will make fun of you, it's only because they respect you as much as I do. So, live long and prosper, Commander. Tuvok nodded once before receding into the shadows. 

Harry said, and Tom took one tentative step forward. Tom, I couldn't have asked for a better friend to spend the last five years with. You once told me that I would do well to stay away from you, and I replied that I choose my own friends. Not once since then have I ever, ever regretted that decision. Sure, we had our ups and downs, but they always made the friendship stronger, until one day I realized that we were practically brothers. There's so much I want to say, but I can't find the words. But, I think you know where I'm coming from, and what I mean. So, take care of B'Elanna. I know it will work out. Bye Tom.

Bye Harry, Tom whispered quietly, then stepped back and gave B'Elanna's hand a squeeze.

Harry said, as she stepped forward, her eyes a little red. Hey Maquis, how's it going? Good, I hope. I just wanted to say that you were the person that taught me the meaning of honor. You are the most honorable and courageous person I know. Never believe anything less. You do have a temper, but it makes you unique, and you wouldn't be B'Elanna without it. Take care of Tom, and always remember that I love you like the sister I never had. B'Elanna stepped back, and hugged Tom fiercely.

said Harry and the Doctor stepped forward. I remember what you were like when your program was first activated. Not a very good bedside manner, if you remember. But, five years later, you are hardly the same hologram. You have evolved and expanded to places where no hologram has gone before. I feel fortunate to have witnessed your growth. I hope you continue to grow and change in ways that no one has imagined. Good luck. The Doctor took a step back without saying a word.

Neelix stepped forward. I just wanted to thank you for being a bit nosy sometimes. You always seemed to know when someone needed to talk about something. And, no matter what anyone says, you were always useful and valued. You always seemed to help the crew's morale when it needed lifting most. Thank you for deciding to join us on our journey home. Neelix smiled a small smile and stepped back.

And Harry paused then. She quietly stepped forward. You are such a wonderful person, when you allow yourself to open up. You have a beautiful smile, and a wonderful, if subtle, sense of humor. You are so very unique and special, and I am glad to have known you, if but briefly. I admire your willingness to adapt and to explore your humanity. I can't say I know what you've gone through, but I hope that your struggle gets easier as time goes on. And, in case I never had the chance to say it in life, I love you. I only hope that you will eventually understand what that means. Good bye. Seven stepped back, lost in thought.

Thank you all for being part of my life. My experiences aboard Voyager were ones that I enjoyed, and will always remember. My life here wasn't just bearable; it was happy because I had you as my friends. Thank you so very much, and good bye. And with that, the hologram disappeared.

The eight looked around, no conversation passed between them, merely silence as each said their last good byes to their friend. Moments later, the holodeck was again dark and empty.

***

A Few Years Later

A lone figured entered the room. The figure hesitated. She hadn't thought about him in so long, but he had been on her mind rather a lot recently. She knew she was finally ready to face what he'd told her, finally ready to see the program. Still, she wondered what facing him would do to her. Nevertheless, she did what she had come to do. Computer, activate program Kim Alpha Omega Seven Nine. Add in holographic image of Ensign Harry Kim. A beep of acknowledgement, and the boring holodeck grid suddenly transformed into a dark and smoky dance hall. Begin program. Another beep of acknowledgement, and the scene began to move.

The people on the dance floor danced away, until the music suddenly changed, becoming slow and seductive. The observer saw the lights dim, and men and women pair off. That's when she spotted Harry Kim, sitting and watching, looking as handsome and alive as he was the last time he was seen. And that's when the observer noticed a woman walking towards him. As she reached him, the singer began to sing.

_At last_

_My love has come along_

_My lonely days are over_

_And life is like a song_

They danced so close, staring at each other. Even though both were holograms, and were across the room, she could still feel the intensity between them.

_At last_

_The skies above are blue_

_My heart was wrapped up in clovers_

_The night I looked at you_

She noticed the emotion in their eyes. It was unadulterated and pure, something the observer had never experienced, but longed for.

_I found a dream that I could speak to_

_A dream that I can call my own_

_I found a thrill to press my cheek to_

_A thrill that I have never known_

The lyrics hit home, and the observer had to sit. So many emotions from the past, all the confusion that had haunted her long ago, began to lift like a fog in the afternoon, to allow the sun to shine.

_Oh yeah, yeah, you smiled, you smiled_

_Oh and then the spell was cast_

_And here we are in heaven_

_For you are mine_

_At last_

The final chords of music hung over the audience, and then they ceased to exist any longer. Computer, end program, Lieutenant (j.g) Hansen said. The scene returned once more to the holodeck grid. And then, a slow, warm smile spread across her face. Thank you Harry. I'm no longer unsure or confused by what you meant, and I loved you too. And Annika Hansen, known to her close friends as Anne, exited the holodeck with a smile on her face and a bounce in her step.

The End.


End file.
